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Squidwards Homicide
Hello my name is Michael Manson Peterson Putin Jr. and that is just a very long ass name. Also why in the actual Hell am I named that way? Anyway one day I was cleaning the garage and I stumbled across some VHS tape called "Squidward Sprite Cranberry". I was like "What the Fuck even is this?". So I tried to put the Damn thing in the VCR player and I used my brothers anyway. When I put this in, the episode shows up. The title showed up and the card said "Squidwards Sprite Cranberry" with the smoke weed everyday song by Snoop Dog. The episode showed up and oh god what I saw in the reflection from Squidwards eyeballs it was a, it was a picture of Kim Jong Un wearing a Fucking diaper with the word "Masturbation" on it. Squidward was happy and said "Haha I bet Spongetitties SquarePorn will be on Donald Trumps side." Squidward was somehow wearing undies. I was shocked to see this Shit. Then the episode cuts to SpongeJobs in the Krusty Krab and somehow he was a Porno of him and Sandy. Why the Fuck would these people put this in a kids show? Then showed a picture of a man taking a shit in a Gamestop Store. Then it cuts to Mr.Krabs making cocaine for Krabby Patty's. So is that how Krabby Patty's are made? Spongebob said to Mr.Krabs "Nice drugs Bitch." Patrick walks in and says "I have DVDs of porn anyone you should watch!" Patrick punches some child in the face. "Yay!" Says Patrick as he was happy. Squidward left The Krusty Krab and said "Goodbye Mothafuckas!" As he said in an Italian voice. Squidward finds Sandy and Squidward was wetting himself as in perverted way. Sandy said "The fuck is wrong with you?" Squidward waters his mouth. Squidward then kills Sandy by being perverted. Then another Image shows up. It was a fucking photo of a family in Walt Disney World and a photoshop of a twerking Squidward is in the photo. The family was screaming! Even one the siblings was crying hard she could've got fucking nightmares. The episode ends with Spongeass and Patdick having a baby. That was the most gay episode I've ever say. After that I was hanging out with my friend going to McDonalds for lunch. We had a good time their and we talked until the News on the TV showed a live footage of a Police Chase with Squidward. I was shocked by seeing this Bullshit. Squidward was out of his car running to some barn and stealing a God Damn cow. He rode until he got arrested by police. Squidward said to The Police "What the Fuck is wrong with you, go get a doctor!" We were shocked by this. When we got back home. I found Spongebob in my door. He turns into HowtoBasics smashing Fucking eggs at me. I had to clean myself from this. It was disgusting. Category:Lost Episodes Category:Creepy Pasta Parody Category:Spongebob